January 30, 2005

What's depression?

I think I have it, and I hope it's only for today cause it's not a nice feeling.

Actually I think I was depressed in England once, when I was in Beeston, Nottingham. If I could find the journal that I wrote that day's entry in, I would quote it here. What happened is that it was winter, December I think. Went to Sainsbury's in the town square (nice town). After I left the supermarket, it was dark and probably only about 5pm. A feeling just came over me and I sat on a bench in the middle of town and started to bawl the living eye water. But winter is said to do that to you, so I guess that explained that.

But today, I am wondering why I feel this way. Afterall, I went to cricket where Jamaica won their fourth straight match. Normally I would go over and talk to the team, congratulate them, take pictures etc. Didn't do any of that. Was supposed to have lunch courtesy of the club, didn't feel like it. Instead, I walked to the car and drove, very very slowly home, while listening to Classical Music on Radio Mona.

Was in the kitchen awhile ago and a wave of "perhaps I don't want to live any more" swept over me. (Of coures I am not going to do anything silly) And as I type this, water has come to my eyes (and no, is not because mi memba Liza, as the folk song says).

Maybe I should call and see if I can get that interview that Ryan wants. I wasn't in the mood today to ask for it at cricket.

Actually, I think it's just time.

Posted by yamfoot at January 30, 2005 03:29 PM
Comments

Bwoy, buck up you hear Mish... it happens to the best of us, why, right now, even I am not in the most uppity of moods... A so it go tho, this too shall pass.

Posted by: Mad Bull at January 30, 2005 05:12 PM

What Mad Bull said.

Posted by: Ry at January 30, 2005 06:22 PM

Michelle, I take this depression business VERRY SERIOUSLY. I am being a doc and friend here. Do not take depression lightly. If you really feel that you may be so, get help.

Recently someone I knew committed suicide. Was depressed and off his meds.

I am not joking. If you want to talk, you can call me. I'm no Psychiatrist, but me a docta.

Regarding England, dah place deh mek anybody bawl.

I reiterate, do not play around if you really feel you may be depressed.

Posted by: Dr. D. at January 30, 2005 09:35 PM

Have a bit ok alot of experience with the depression thing. Try to fight it my friend. Dont let it take hold too heavily, I mean we all cant fell wonderful all the time but if its serious depression ya have to deal with it before it really really leaves you helpless.

Posted by: jdid at January 31, 2005 12:10 PM

Sounds like just a down day and not really depression.You got to worry when it continues for days on end.Anyway,try snap out of it as depression is hell

Posted by: kami at February 1, 2005 02:49 PM