The next decade....what's in store?

Healthy breasts......healthy Va-Jay-Jay?

Monday I had two medical exams. One for the titties, and the other for the eyes. I'm at that age where I need to check up on things more often you know. Just a few days before Monday, a friend had sent me an email with some cartoon pictures of mammogram jokes. Very funny.

I had done one I thought in 2006, however when the nurse checked, it was actually 2005. Time sure flies. They have a different machine but the squashing/flattening is the same. She was able to show me the picture of my titties with the shady patches that they needed to further investigate, but I couldnt do it then because the Eye Doctor was calling....

First the drops the test the pressure (good readings), then the drops to make me blind so she could see the retina. There is a waiting period between when she puts the blind drops in and when she examines me. I had forgotten that she might have to do this and had driven. In order for me not to have to wait in her office for the two hours it would take to wear off, I drove up the road to my brother's office, parked the car there and walked back down....with some degree of difficulty.

Retinas are in good shape...surprisingly she says, because people who are as short sighted as me are expected to have degenerative retinas. I guess I ate enough carrots when I was younger.

The Eye doctor's office is in a plaza where a food shop is. I didnt feel for meat, so I asked what the side dishes were. Macaronie and fried plantain!!!! Made my day! so ordered one serving of each, went across the road to by 'unmentionables' and a drink in the pharmacy. To stop the effects of the sun hurting my now sensitive eyes, the doctor had given me a plastic sun glasses type thingy to put over my glasses. The security guard in the pharmacy said "that's the most unusual glasses I have ever seen".

Back out on the street, a man sees me with the lunch box and said "you know how long ah been waiting on di lunch?" I tell foreigners that there are some nice people in Jamaica and that when you get beyond the bad man and intimidating exterior of some, they are really nice easy going people.

Up at the brother's office, he was not there. They showed me the lunch room and I chowed down the macaronie pie (as we small islanders call it!) and plantain with glee. I could eat those two things for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day. Of course I would need to spend the rest of every day at the gym!

Anyway, everything checked out ok for the Monday tests. I did the titty ultrasound after I left the brother's office and that was fine too. The Wednesday test was supposed to be on the va-jay-jay (heard Oprah use this term last week in one of her shows), but then if you remember what I call 'unmentionables' then you know why I have had to postpone that exam until next Monday. The 'Guyanese' doctor don't know that yet. Must remember to call he tomorrow to explain.

In and between, I am calling friends. Two a day. Seeing friends. A few each day. The time is short, and I have to make the most of it.

Posted by yamfoot at January 21, 2008 11:42 PM